LEADERSHIP QUOTE:

"Failing to hold someone accountable is ultimately an act of selfishness." Patrick Lencioni

A LITTLE BIT DEEPER:

We're looking at the each of the dysfunctions that Lencioni describes in his book, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team.

We looked at TRUST the first week, then we looked at the FEAR OF CONFLICT. Last week we talked about COMMITMENT. We're working through all five dysfunctions this month and identifying some areas we might need to pay special attention.

Today we're talking about ACCOUNTABILITY and we have one more dysfunction to look at next week.

I remember a lesson on accountability very clearly. I was a church custodian as a 14-year old and my father was the Pastor. I assumed the job would be fairly easy in that my dad was my boss, and it really didn't take much to clean the church.

I would clean every Saturday Morning, then I would show up early on Sunday to dust and make sure everything was good.

A few weeks into my working career my dad showed up early on Sunday and he walked around the church with me and identified some areas that I had failed to clean. I had missed some spots with the vacuum, I hadn't dusted the piano very well, and there was trash blown in from the street on the patio. These are all things he had asked me to do, but either I just didn't do them, or I didn't do them well.

Remember, I assumed the job would be easy and thought I could just get it done quickly. What I learned was that there were some really clear expectations of me in order to earn that 100 Sucre (yes, a fortune at that time in Ecuador) paycheck. Not only was I given the expectations, but I was held to that standard.

I'm not sure I was ever a great custodian (ask my mother about my bedroom), but I learned how to do what was expected of me. I learned a lesson in accountability and learned how to ensure that my Dad, the Pastor, wouldn't find my work unfinished or not done well.

Accountability is simply my willingness to accept responsibility to do what I say I'll do or what I agree to do.

In the case of my church job, accountability happened when my "boss" checked to see that I was doing what I had agreed to do to the standard that was expected.

When did the word ACCOUNTABILITY become a negative term? Why do we so often push against it?

LEADERSHIP QUOTE:

"Commitment is a function of two things: clarity and buy-in." Patrick Lencioni

A LITTLE BIT DEEPER:

We're looking at the each of the dysfunctions that Lencioni describes in his book, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team.

We looked at TRUST the first week, then last week looked at the FEAR OF CONFLICT We're working through all five dysfunctions this month and identifying some areas we might need to pay special attention.

I'm assuming this is a refresh, but I'm still surprised by the number of people I run into who have never walked through Lencioni's Five Dysfunctions Model. If you're one of them, stop reading my summaries and read his book. It's worth the read!

I love this quote on commitment because it's so simple, yet as a leader, I can't count the number of times I asked people to COMMIT without having the clarity around the project defined and without giving people the opportunity to BUY-IN.

LACK OF COMMITMENT is Lencioni's third dysfunction.

Years ago a good friend invited me to serve on his Board. I responded quickly by saying yes, then I asked some questions about expectations and what value he thought I could bring to the Board. His reply was simply to come and engage and then we'd work that all out.

I attended my very first Board Meeting, and we were all challenged to do some things for the organization that surprised me. They wanted me to donate financially a specific amount, they wanted me to commit to raise funds, and they wanted me to take a specific role in a capital campaign.

I was surprised at the expectations, and at the first break of the meeting, I pulled my friend aside, who was the President, and asked him why he hadn't shared these expectations with me earlier. He simply replied, "If I had shared these with you earlier, you wouldn't have joined the Board."

My response: I resigned at the end of that first day of meeting, and I'm sure I was the shortest serving Board Member in that organizations history. My reason for resigning was that I wasn't given the opportunity to AGREE to what was happening, but had been expected to just follow along.

Lessons learned:

• If someone asks me to serve, I ask many more questions today than I did before, even when the request comes from a friend.

• While I can't know everything, due diligence is really important so that I can make an informed decision.

• After asking questions, doing the due diligence, I'm then able to commit and buy-in to what I've been invited into.

• If there's any questions or concerns, I don't just move forward, but I address those head-on and work towards clarity first, then I respond.

Do you have any stories like mine where you made a decision without having all the needed information? What was the result of that?

LEADERSHIP QUOTE:

"When there is trust, conflict becomes nothing but the pursuit of truth, an attempt to find the best possible answer." Patrick Lencioni

A LITTLE BIT DEEPER:

We're looking at the each of the dysfunctions that Lencioni describes in his book, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team.

Last week I started where Lencioni starts... TRUST. His entire model is built with trust at the foundation, and he says again and again, "if you have trust, then you can...."

He challenges us over and over again to build that solid foundation of trust, which we described last week as being connected to vulnerability.

You'll need that solid foundation, because the next dysfunction he looks at is FEAR OF CONFLICT.

In the book, Lencioni describes different kinds of conflict and explains different ways people approach it. I think the most valuable thing he does is he breaks the common belief that "conflict is bad".

If I ask a room full of leaders how many are comfortable with conflict vs. how many avoid it, it always lands in the 80-20 ratio. Most people avoid it, but there are some who are comfortable with it.

Lencioni, the quote above, describes conflict as "the pursuit of truth". He goes on to say that a meeting without conflict is an unnecessary meeting.

He describes ways in which conflict helps us find truth, helps us argue and disagree rationally, and talks about the value that comes when people passionately share their views and opinions.

In another book he says that "meetings without conflict is boring".

I don't know about that.

I'm not afraid of conflict, but I don't always welcome it. I've learned a lot over the years of what my tolerance is and how to allow the right amount.

There's a tipping point when conflict can move quickly from a "healthy conflict" into a "mean-spirited personal attack". I've seen this happen, and this does damage to the team, to the organization and to the leader.

Years ago, while engaged in a deep conflict, I learned the lesson that you can disagree, you can discuss passionately, and you can call someone out for their behavior, but then you can continue in your relationship and move on.... IF YOU HAVE A FOUNDATION OF TRUST!

What's your personal tolerance for conflict? Think about how you approach this at work, at home, at church, in your community?